Friday Frights and More

1) The Occasional Dumba$$ Rapper Roundup: Shouldn't surprise anyone, but yet another rapper just got their ass handed to them by the justice system and rightly so. One Remy Ma of New York was pronounced guilty of assault, illegal posession of a weapon (.45 calibre with hollow point bullets) and attempted coercion (shouldn't that read, attempted robbery?) after shooting a woman near a nightclub in 2007. Remy claims that she meant to shoot someone else, a friend (HUH?) she suspected of stealing $3000 from her. Sadly, someone else just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Ms Remy is staring down the barrel of 25 years in the slammer (GOOD I say!), though somehow, she was acquitted of witness tampering and gang assault charges (how did THAT happen?). I know, some people probably think I'm stereotyping unfairly, but dang it, this kind of thing happens WAY TOO OFTEN to be a coincidence or some unjustified stereotype, this is a real serious problem people, and the Hip-Hop/Rap culture shares more than a little of the blame for such stupid, violent and criminal/anti-social behavior. Story HERE

And while we're at it, Atlanta rapper TI finally saw there was no way he could beat the rap so he pleaded guilty to illegal weapons charges (which SHOULD'VE gotten him 10 years easily) but because of a plea agreement, he just might get a lighter sentence (his first installment is 1000 hours of community service effective now). Formal sentencing willl take place March of 2009, which could mean if he lives up to his deferred sentencing agreement, he will be sentenced to one year in prison, pay a $100,000 fine, spend three years under supervised release, including a year of home detention, and perform a total of 1,500 hours of community service, this according to U.S. Attorney David Nahmias. Story HERE Another account in the AJC goes on to say that if TI blows it (which he most likely will), it's 8 years in the joint for him.

2) Hillary's Delusions of Grandeur: Poor Hillary Clinton, can't seem to catch a break, especially since many documents regarding her time as First Lady (and to me, "Lady" is stretching things) were made public. In her desperate bid to claim "foreign policy experience" it seems that she recalled a trip to Bosnia, claiming to be under heavy sniper fire when she landed, but in reality, she made the trip 3 months after the war in Bosnia was officially over, taking along her daughter Chelsea and two entertainers. Ands that's not even the half of it, as at least from thsi list on Fact Check.org indicates, she, shall we say LIES or EXAGGERATES HER ACCOMPLISHMENTS, OOPS, I'm sorry, that should read, "Misspoke". More here on FactCheck.org

3) World's Earliest Sound Recording?: Clocking in at a whopping 10 seconds but no less significant, US researchers have found a recording of someone singing "Claire De Lune'". A French inventor, Edouard-Leon Scott de Martinville was responsible for this significant first step in recording technology in the year 1860 with a device known as the phonautograph, which scratched sound onto a sheet of paper coated by the smoke of an oil lamp. This was 17 years BEFORE Thomas Edison invented the phonograph. The interesting twist is, that de Martinville had NO intention of playing back the sound, he simply wanted a visual representation of sound waves to study. News story HERE, and even more amazing, the recording itself can be heard HERE

4) Outrageous Rockstar Demands: From time to time, I've wondered how some of these intelligence-deficient but ego endowed rock stars got their demands met or what they were to begin with (out of some morbid curiosity I admit), well, The Smoking Gun has aspecial secton on its website specially dedicated to rockstar/entertainer backstage demands, some relatively benign, others enough to want to call the Happy Wagon and stage an intervention, read 'em HERE

ON THE PLAYER

King Kong: Jean Luc Ponty Plays the Music of Frank Zappa

From the year 1970 comes this quirky gem by an up and coming violinist from France who paid his dues initially in the classical world before developing a jones for Coltrane and other jazz greats. Ponty had played on Frank Zappa's groundbreaking "Hot Rats" LP and good 'ol Frank wanting to showcase the violinists talents more visibly (though he'd already been making albums since the mid 1960's) put this session together utilizing some of L.A.'s top jazz players (like Ernie Watts) and even some from the classical world. Here, Ponty re-interprets several of Frank's songs to great effect (the jaunty title track, the HILARIOUS "America Drinks and Goes Home", and even the haunting balladry of "20 Small Cigars" for example) and even contributes an odd half-blues/half Latin original, "How Would You Like To Have A Head Like That?". The real challenge comes with Zappa's "Music for Electric Violin and Low Budget Orchestra" (named so because Frank couldn't get the necessary funds for a full orchestra for the piece, so he had to settle for a smaller chamber ensemble. The piece hits a lot of terrotory from Stravinsky to jazz to whatever with Ponty weaving his way through it masterfully and with great wit. Highly recommended

HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE!!!

Dana Perino,, Worlds DUMBEST White House Press Secretary!

Ahhh, the unenviable job of being White House Press Secretary, the OFFICIAL job description is to be a liaison between the President and the press, HOWEVER, we all know the REAL job description is to lie, spin and obfuscate on behalf of the president. Well, looks like Bright Boy Bush currently ties the record for most press secretaries (4 currently, along with Bill Clinton and Harry Truman), the previous being Ari Fleischer, Scott McLellan and Tony Snow. And since Snow's resignation in 2006, Dana Perino occupies the slot. Without question, Ms Perino is the DUMBEST, most incompetent, vacuous and utterly useless and clueless Press Secretary to reside at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in this, or ANY administration. As much as I cannot stand Tony Snow (mainly because of his association with False News), at least he had something of a brain. Ms Perino actually gives "ditzy blondes" a bad name to put it kindly.

Time after time, Dana really outdones herself and proved once again that the Bush Administration is a dangerous carrier of contagious stupidity, incompetence and ignorance. One particular incident occurred October 26, 2007 when a reporter quizzed her regarding the missile defense shield proposed for Eastern Europe and how it compared to the Cuban Missile Crisis, she of course was a deer in the headlights, trying desperately to concoct an answer, the best she could do was a "they're not the same thing" reply with little or no substance to it. A short time later, she appears on an NPR Radio quiz show called "Wait--Wait--Don't Tell Me", she FINALLY admitted she had NO idea what the Cuban Missile Crisis was at all (she had to ask her husband about it, he was shocked to put it mildly). HERE is a written transcript of her appearance, One news story HERE. Another incident on March 20, 2008 involved her spectacular bungling about how Bush and Cheney disregard opinion polls, and in the end, Genius Girl winds up painting the picture that Bush strives to be unpopular. Hmmm, quite interesting considering Bush is too damned lazy to strive for much of anything in the way of humility or common sense. The details HERE

And MSNBC commentator Keith Olbermann has featured her MANY incompetencies on his Countdown broadcasts, among some of them were his "Worst Person In The World Award", the "Cuban Missile Crisis incident"and the lies regarding the National Intelligence Estimate Part One and Part Two

Not a big deal you might say? Well, let's face facts, this kind of ignorance of history, inexcusable stupidity, bungling and intellectual shallowness is sadly de rigeur for the Bush Administration as a whole, completely antithetical to what this country stands for. No wonder our credibility as a nation is zero to none in many countries, because we ALLOW idiots free reign! This just should not be! It's things like this that make a compelling case for a MANDATORY IQ Test for anyone that runs for national office and anyone that is appointed by said candidates if they win the office. And ANYTHING below 130 should be considered a FAILING grade. George Walker Bush, you're going to stay after school young man!!!

And an interesting fact about Dana Perino, she was on A DEBATE TEAM at Colorado State University-Pueblo!!!!????????

RIP Arthur C. Clarke - 1917-2008

A true original, visionary and well-loved author took leave of the planet this week, one Arthur C Clarke at the age of 90 suffering breathing problems and the long-term effects of Post-Polio Syndrome at his home in Sri Lanka.

The English born Clarke had a long and varied career, originally educated at King's College attaining a degree in Physics and Mathematics after WWII. He served with the British Royal Air Force, during which time he wrote a now highly regarded memo predicting the idea of communications satellites. He became a prolific author of both science fiction and science fact, and after a series of explorations and writing about his adventures in The Great Barrier Reef, he permanently relocated to Sri Lanka in 1956. Although encumbered at times by Post-Polio Syndrome on land at times, Clarke found himself "perfectly operational" underwater, and he scuba-dived well into old age.

Among his most loved works were short stories like "The 9 Billion Names of God" and "The Sentinel" (originally written in 1948, this became the basis of Stanley Kubrick's classic film 2001: A Space Odyssey), novels like "Rendezvous With Rama", "Childhood's End" and "The City and The Stars" and of course, his novelization of the 2001 screenplay in collaboration with Stanley Kubrick. He was also very active as a lecturer, teacher, television commentator on science (I even remember him being part fo the on-air commentary of the first Apollo moon landing in 1969).

His final wishes included:

Launching hair with strands of his DNA into space, for Sri Lanka's raging civil war to end, for the world to embrace cleaner sources of energy and for evidence of extraterrestrial beings to be discovered.

News story HERE, and an excellent Wikipedia article on his life and career.

A Little Monday Madness

Well folks, due to an insanely busy workday, and a rather harrowing Friday night (3/14/2008), complete with an F-2 twister ripping right through the center of Atlanta, I just couldn't get to writing a Friday Follies, maybe this week. So instead, I'll regale you with some Monday Madness, hopefully you'll find this an acceptable substitute.

1) The King Gets Crowned (or is that OWNED!): I LOVE these kinds of stories, where some shyster lawyer gets theirs with interest! Richard Scruggs,, otherwise known as The King Of Torts could be looking at 5 years in the slammer, and in this Owl's opinion, that is an obscenely light sentence given the magnitude of his crime, . Scruggs and another lawyer in his firm, Sidney Backstrom, pleaded guilty to conspiracy to defraud for offering a $50,000 cash bribe to a Mississippi judge for a favorable ruling in a dispute over legal fees from a Hurricane Katrina insurance lawsuit. Scruggs son Zach has also been implicated and will go to trial himself. And of course, he's facing the possibility of disbarment to boot. Serves 'em right! Story HERE

2) The King Gets Crowned Part 2: Robert Soloway at the tender age of 28 has become the King of Spam and in doing so, inviting a number of well-deserved civil suits against him. This unscrupulous bastard boasted of being sued for hundreds of millions of dollars and not paying a dime and of course having been in his particular racket 10 years running. Well, after being arrested in May 2007, he finally realized there was no way in Hell he could win or beat the rap and very recently pleaded guilty to the charges, and now staring down the barrel of 26 years as a guest of the Federal government. Now THAT"s my kind of justice! All Hail The King of Dumba$$es! Story HERE

3a) Principles Are Good Things #4561: General William Fallon, now former commander of our military's Central Command in the Middle East resigned this past week over principle, and this Owl salutes you as a rare patriot for having the guts and intestinal fortitude to oppose our Smiling Buffoon In Chief's insatiable and senseless desire to attack Iran (an innately stupid idea to start with given that our forces are over-extended already) and his senseless failed policies in general. With our armed forces already in bad shape because of the combined stupidity of the Clinton AND Bush administrations, one can see how stupid and near suicidal such an idea is. General Fallon certainly saw it, in much the same way Colin Powell, after pleading with Bush to NOT invade Iraq, saw the writing on the wall and resigned. The GOP might brand you many things, but this Owl says you did the right thing in opposing one who genuinely has turned out to be The Worst President of All Time.

3b EDITED TO ADD) Heard Straight From The Horse's A$$ #6701: Our Batman Villain of a VP Dick "The Penguin" Cheney, while making a trip through Iraq has the utter audacity to STILL insist that Iraq and the 9/11 terrorist attacks were connected when it's VERY common knowledge the two had ZERO to do with each other I mean,. how TERMINALLY clueless. moronic, stupid and out of touch with reality can one get? Further proof that haging around with George W Bush (or ANY member of this odious Bush family) WILL lower your IQ exponentially. Story HERE

4) Incredible Penetrating Insight and Eloquent Erudition #8245: Who've thought it was possible, Mariah Carey publicly admits that "I understand that people think I am a ditzy moron." WOW!!!!! Stop the presses!!! This is truly HISTORIC!

5) Weird Coincidences #5151: Ever notice that a rather disproportionately high number of serial killers and other psychotic felons have the middle name of Wayne?

John Wayne Gacy - Serial murderer
Eric Wayne Kelley — sex charges
Nathan Wayne Green — kidnapping and beating, homicide
Ronald Wayne Spencer, Jr. — triple homicide
David Wayne Rhodes — 10 years for practicing nursing without a license
Larry Wayne King — homicide
Paul Wayne Mitchell — Theft
Michael Wayne Hills — theft
Jeremy Wayne Hopkins — homicide
Garry Wayne Carriker — knowingly having unprotected sex when HIV positive
Bruce Wayne Potts — homicide
Joshua Wayne Jones — assault of officer
Billy Wayne Sinclair — homicide
Billy Wayne Boyer — assault
Billy Wayne Miller — attempted murder and robbery
Kenneth Wayne Downs — sex assault
Jerry Wayne Lucas — attempted homicide
Tony Wayne Swinnie — aggravated assault of grandmother in front of her grandchildren, robbery
Larry Wayne Dacy — home invasion
Richard Wayne Miles — police standoff
Charles Wayne Thomas — homicide

Many of these come from The Dallas News from February 2006 to the present, as given to NY Times writer Stephen Levitt , who wrote THIS post on said subject., and a News Of The Weird article on this phenomenon too.

6) Just How Efficient Can A Car Be? Well good 'ol Shell Oil of all people every year has this competition for car builders to see just how much mileage they can squeeze out ofa gallon of gas by any means necessary. And the winner?A team from St. Joseph La Joliverie in France went 7,148 miles on a single gallon of fuel, NO JOKE!! Story HERE

7) Top Gear: Ya gotta hand it to those Brits, who else could pull off a car-centric TV programme with such humor wit and style as our 3 hosts Jeremy Clarkson, James May and Richard Hammond? These three put you in the drivers seat of thrilling test drives of the latest high-performance cars, laugh their arses off at top Brit celebrities in interviews and as they attempt to get their 4-wheeled mojo going in the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car segment. And there's a mysterious test driver who never speaks and who listens to anything from prog-rock to self-help and language instruction CD's while he test drives, the inimitable The Stig!

And it just gets wackier and better. Our three free-wheeling hosts attempt insane stunts (for instance, one segment about how to properly drive a Rolls Royce into a pool), and even more insane challenges (like driving across the North Pole, motoring across the salt flat in Namibia in nothing ore than skeletal Mercedes, Lancias and a 1963 Opel!. And there's my favorite, converting a Toyota pickup, a VW van and a Lotus 2-seat sports car into amphibious vehicles and cross The English Channel)

The Top Gear magazine is well loved among car enthusiasts but there's just something about taking the magazine into the TV world that just gives it something extra cool, go to the website and see for yourself, or watch it on BBC2. Fun stuff for sure!

Please Say It Ain't So Elliot!

Talk about irony and shock, HOLY CRAP!!!!!

Elliot Spitzer, former NY state Attorney General and now governor has confessed to and publically apologized for his involvement in a prostitution ring!!!! ???????

I'm not taking this particularly well right now, especially in light of the fact that Elliot had numerous successes particularly as Attorney General in going after corrupt corporations for unlawful practices (as a musician, I especially applauded his going after several major labels for price fixing, payola and withholding royalties), and now, irony of ironies, he turned to the dark side himself. I guess it's the nature of politics, even the most noble and honorable ones get lured into places they just shouldn't even consider going. It ain't the first time a public figure of this stature has taken a fall over something inexcusably stupid, but man, this one hurts!

Elliot, though I am more than a little furious at you and very saddened by these revelations, I hope that you will get the help you need and regain your self-respect and get back to being what I and others have admired you for, a crusader for the interests of the average person.

Story HERE

Putting A Shine On Fridays!

Is this a real coffee table book?, Nyahhhh, but you never know, they've got coffee table books for just about everything these days. And thus my first object of illumination:




1) Other Coffee Table Books You'll Probably NEVER See In Your Friendly Neighborhood Barnes and Noble:

And HERE is a CNN feature on some REAL weird coffee table books.

And last but certainly not least, Amazon carries THIS volume on, you guessed it, COFFEE TABLES!


2) Passing The Torch #2994: This week, syndicated Miami Herald columnist Leonard Pitts wrote a very cool column of his experience in passing words of wisdom to an aspiring high-school age journalist. The basic gist was this, that STILL, by some miracle in an age of unreason and when people like Bill O'Reilly and their ilk labor under the foolish notion that one wins an argument based solely on the volume level or viciousness of said argument, that some are persuaded by actual words and logic. This young journalist had written a column taking to task the wearing and display of Confederate flags (something referred to as some as The American Swastika) and of course he was expecting flack but wasn't quite prepared for threats to his person. Leonard counseled him very compassionately and in such a manner that encouraged him to keep going and stick to his principles. Better still, one person that read that column saw the light and "retired" his wardrobe. The complete column HERE

3) The Old Bush Magic: Well George Dubbaya's gone and done it, he officially endorsed his former rival John McCain for prez. So, will the old "Bush Magic*" work for Insane McCain this fall? One could hope! (*Bush Magic = A well known quirk of George Bush Senior and Junior that when they say someone's doing a great job or endorse a person in ANY capacity, it's a sure fire kiss-of-death to that person's career and/or reputation)

4) Admitting It Is One Thing--: But when will our ever so vigilant FBI (Federal Bureau of Incompetence) show the proper remorse over recent revelations that it KNOWINGLY obtained personal information on innocent Americans improperly and WITHOUT ANY just cause whatsoever for FOUR YEARS RUNNING!!? William Moeller, I know a good sackcloth and ashes dealer just down the street from you-- (STORY HERE) And wouldn't you know it, the FBI has had 39% FEWER referrals and prosecutions since 2001, you're slipping here guys! Story HERE.
And it's not looking too good for the White House Clowns either,Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington has just bought before a Federal court allegations that the White House has made numerous false and misleading statements regarding e-mails that it was under legal obligation and orders from a Federal judge to preserve but deleted anyway. All I can say is this, there HAVE to be special circles or places in Hell for people like the shamelessly lawless and amoral Bush Administration, one could hope anyway. The story HERE

5) Comedy Changing Culture? A fascinating new book has surfaced recently that has my interest, a profile of a number of innovative and cutting-edge comedians and how they've served to alter our culture, and have us laughing at and even confronting once taboo subjects. Starting with George Carlin's rise to prominence in the late 60's, "Comedy At The Edge" examines how a slew of comics in the late 60's through early 80's stripped away the sugar-coating and got us to not be so uptight with certain subject matter. Richard Zoglin did his research alright, delving into the workings and psyches of folks like George Carlin, Robert Klein, Richard Pryor, Steve Martin, Albert Brooks, Andy Kaufman (who started to lean more towards performance art in many ways) and the rise of a young upstart by the name of Jerry Seinfeld by the early 80's. Wondering why you laugh at and WHO you laugh at sometimes, take a look at this book, the insights and answers just might surprise you.

HAPPY FRIDAY Y'ALL!!